Cheap

Watch a movie and go to bed. It would be more accurate to say that I was asleep when I realized I was awake, rather than that I was asleep when I realized I was awake. I carry out the few habits I have to do every day, but there is no hardship in doing so. It is so ingrained in my body that I cannot live without it, and it is done unconsciously. How to live with the part that is not unconscious, the part that is regulated by will, but even that part may be a habit. Aside from that, I wish I could live comfortably. I feel like I am behind in everything. When will I catch up? Is it more solid to accept myself as I am? I wonder when I was my true self, but I guess I will never be complete. Everything is in transition.

2023.7.10