Shadow

Should we suffer when we are in pain?
Is it something we can control?
Why do we feel sadness and suffering?
It's not that we can't afford it.
We are all struggling to stay alive, though I don't know why we are alive.
There are plenty of things that we can feel sad about even if we are not in dire circumstances.
That is what makes me sad.
Why do we feel sad when there is no need to feel sad?
Today I often think back to when I was in college.
I spent hours working on the next day's assignments in a library-like space, wondering if my computer would be stolen.
It wasn't fun at all, there wasn't enough time, and yet I still managed to live every day.
It was very, very hard and I couldn't do it by myself.
Even though I spent a lot of time, only a few points remain in my memory.
I think I grieve more now.
I am blessed with a good environment, but my heart is weak.
There is no hope for life, no.

2023.6.6